2 Meet My Sister Sam: Two Year Fertility Journey & Late Induction Natural Birth Story

Meet Sam, Heidi’s big sister, who loves on and teases Heidi in equal measure in this heartwarming episode of Birth Story Podcast. Listen in to hear about how stress can impact your fertility as well as a slew of natural induction techniques you may or may not have heard of. Sam's favorite birthing product was the birthing chair.

Looking for a Virtual Doula to create a custom birthing experience and guide you through your journey to parenthood in the United States? Contact Heidi at www.mydoulaheidi.com

For additional free birth education resources and to purchase Heidi’s book, Birth Story: Pregnancy Guidebook + Journal, visit www.birthstory.com.

Want to share your thoughts on the episode? Leave a review and send a message directly to Heidi on Instagram.

TRANSCRIPTION

What does a contraction feel like? How do I know if I'm in labor and what does the day of labor look like? Wait, is this normal? Hey, I'm Heidi Campbell, a certified birth doula host of this podcast, birth story and owner of my doula, Heidi. I have supported hundreds of women through their labor and deliveries.

And I believe that every one of them and you deserves a microphone and a state. So here we are listen each week to get answers to these tough questions and more birth story, where we talk about pregnancy labor deliveries, where we tell our stories, share our feelings. And of course chat about our favorite baby products.

And because I'm passionate about birth outcomes, you will hear from some of the top experts in labor and delivery, whether you are pregnant, trying desperately to get pregnant, I hope you will stick around and be part of this tribe. Episode two, grab a latte and get comfortable because I am interviewing my sister on the podcast today and she is a crackup.

And I just want to tell you that she had a two year long fertility journey that led to an overdue baby and an induction. And in this episode, I'm not kidding. She calls her husband a Jedi master of orgasms. So I'm Heidi Campbell, host of the purse story podcast. Welcome Samantha. So, um, first of all, I know we've been sisters and like 46, you know, and we've been sisters for a long time, but I don't go by Samantha.

I'll just let you know that now. I'm sorry, everyone. Sam. So Sam says, all right, sorry, listeners. This is my sister saying, wait, let's tell the listeners why I call you Samantha. Most of the time, because I named my dog Sayer after your ex-boyfriend. Sam said. So, yeah, so I guess I should think that's nice.

Cause you don't want me to be like your dog or something. I don't know, but I go by Sam. Sam is my name. Okay. Hey Sam. Okay. Okay. So, so let's talk about, um, your pregnancy and getting pregnant because I want listeners to hear your story leading up to getting pregnant with Alisandra. Okay. Um, so Alisandra is my 13 year old and my husband and I had been trying for like two years to get pregnant and we, we really wanted a baby.

We had dated and lived together for like five years before, um, we ever moved, um, before we got married. You sinner. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Um, but you know, we both come from broken homes, so we just want to make sure everything was copacetic and what's going to work. Um, and so. Once we got married, then we started trying for a baby and it took two years before actually I got pregnant with Alisandra now he didn't like do the whole.

Well, let's look at the term fertility and, you know, measure all these different things. And we weren't like crazy about it. We just had sex when we wanted to have sex and we're hoping for the best, but I was really concerned. It was like worrying to me. Cause I was like, I feel like my entire life that my, my body was like made to give birth to babies.

And like, why was I not getting pregnant? Which I know I've had a lot of friends who have had similar circumstances to, um, So real quick, how old were you? So good question. If I'm 46 now and he's 13, I was, what is that? 33. So when you gave 30 you 30 to 32, when you were having yup. Either you or your husband, you were on a fertility journey though for two years in your early thirties?

Yes. And then, um, Uh, we went on a trip to Germany. So we went on this really fun. Fabulous trip to Germany. And we had an amazing time and we were relaxed and we were drinking a little bit and all kinds of things probably that you shouldn't be doing for getting pregnant. Um, but we had this great time and we were in the baths and bought in Baldwin.

And, uh, we, we believe that he was conceived in the town of bought button where the baths are in Germany. Um, cause we were having a really good time there. Um, so, um, when we got back from the trip. I was pregnant. So I don't know if it was just a measure of being relaxed and he was relaxed and, um, all the stars were aligned, but yeah.

Two years into our journey. Then I was pregnant with Alessandra and we were super happy about it. We, by the way, almost named him Bodden. I'm really glad that you didn't do that. Which means bath. Oh my God. That's okay. Well, at least it's his name is Alisandra Chagall after a couple of different painters, correct?

Well, Alisandra just so we could have a Hispanic name cause my husband's Hispanic. And then, um, shingle is for a Russian Jewish painter that we love. Awesome. Yeah, I love the name. So one of the things that you've shared with me is that you. Like when you learned you were pregnant, that you felt different.

So tell me about what it was like, what happened to you with both of your pregnancies that kind of let you know that you were pregnant? So I had never heard of this before from anybody, but when I was. Um, so when we were in Germany, um, we then went over to Belgium. And when we went to Belgium, we were starting, we were staying this really cute place with little courtyard and cobblestone streets.

And it was just like so romantic and fabulous. And, you know, it was time to go out and about in the town of Belgium and deuce or in the town of Belgium. But Belgium's on a job. I swear she has a master's right. Right. What we're about to go out and about? I don't even know actually remember what town we were in.

Um, and I just, I got a fever. I felt sick and I said, I can't go out. So I have actually never seen Belgium besides our hotel. Um, Because I just felt bad. I got in the bathtub, I got a fever. I felt sick. And lo and behold, when I got home, I was pregnant. So I just thought, Oh, maybe that sickness coincided at the same time with, you know, conception.

But then when I had my, my second child Peyton, the same exact thing happened, like I got a fever. I didn't feel well. I had to stay in bed. Um, I just, I didn't feel quite right. Like that's. That's the best way I can explain it. And again, that was my signal with her that I was pregnant. Cause I was like, Oh, maybe this is the same thing that happened with Alisandra.

Cool. So how did your pregnancy. Go overall. It was awesome. Like, it was amazing. I loved being pregnant. I loved Alisandra being in my belly. I love seeing my belly grow. Um, I love feeling the little kicks of him. I think I wasn't really somebody who got sick. The only thing I was in the beginning part of my pregnancy mostly was like a little nauseous where I just kind of had to have snacks everywhere.

So I had like, you know, the little center console in your car. I had like nuts and you know, just things. Yeah. That wouldn't spoil. If I kept them in my car, crackers, that kind of thing, because literally I'd be somewhere and I'd be like, if you don't give me something to stick in my mouth right now, it is not going to be good.

So that was a weird feeling to me, with pregnancy of you feel nauseous, but you feel like you need to eat something. Cause every prior experience in my life besides being pregnant or feeling nauseous, Of course, you don't want to eat anything, but this nausea for pregnancy, I had to stick something in my mouth.

Okay. So you never had to take any medicine? No, no, no, no. So the pregnancy was great. I walked all the time. That was a big thing with me is going and walking in the woods and, um, there's this great place called Ben Creek, but I still go walking and I love it. And so I walked all through my pregnancy. Yeah.

So what happened as you got close to the end? Like. Did you have a due date? Did you know? I mean, you, you said that you knew when you were. When maybe you got pregnant. So like, did you think that your due date was accurate? Um, I'm one of those people who doesn't really believe in due dates. I kinda just think, Oh, your baby's coming around that period of time.

Um, but it was, uh, February. So Alisandra was to be due at the beginning couple of weeks. Uh, February and he ended up being born on February 23rd. So we were really hoping he would come on February 22nd. Cause that's my grandfather's birthday and my daddy, Sam. So I thought that would be really, really cool thing to happen.

But, um, he didn't, he came on the 23rd. Um, but what else were you asking? So on that light, you were overdue. So your due date was sometime in early February. And so what was that like when. Kind of the due date came and went. So going to my physician, who she is, wonderful, amazing person. She kept saying, you know, well, you're going over the due date.

And usually we end deuce, if you go over the due date. And I was like, Oh, come on, give it maybe just a little bit more time. So she gave the baby like another week and then nothing happened. And. I'll tell you a couple of things. I did two and then, and then two weeks and she basically said two weeks is my limit.

Like why you need to be induced. So after two weeks past it due date is when I had an appointment at 8:00 AM at the house, spittle to be induced with Pitocin, to start some of the contractions that petite. Pitocin, um, just gets the contraction started. Um, so I was really disappointed about that and I tried everything I could for the two weeks prior to get Alisandra to come out.

But he was, he was very happy inside my belly and I think he wanted to stay there for a very long time and he didn't want to come out right then. So what are some of the things that you did to try. So my massage therapist, Isabel was amazing. So I would, I had massages all throughout pregnancy and she'd gave us amazing, um, prenatal massages.

And so she said, okay, this isn't going to feel like all those really nice other muscles is that you've had. And it was like pressure points on my ankles where she. Dug in and just like, kind of hurt you on your ankles. And those trigger points or pressure points are supposed to help with getting contractions started.

Unfortunately they did not for me. And I think I did that a couple of times with her. And then I decided to go to acupuncture. So one of my best friends, her husband is a Chinese medicine doctor. And he's like, yeah, you should come for acupuncture. We do it all the time too. And apparently there's a lot of, of evidence that goes along with that.

So yeah, I went in for that session and I believe the majority of the needles they put were on my sacral area. On my back and you definitely could feel the sort of electric charge, you know, um, down there. And I could feel the baby moving around a little bit more Alisandra was moving around. But again, did not induce labor.

And at that same, um, Chinese medicine doctor, office, the acupuncture, they're like, okay, try this tea. Are you willing to do anything? And I'm like, yes. And it was this tea that contained, I'm not shitting you like a dried sea horse in it. And they're like, police. Yes, please. And drink this whole thing and I'm like drink this seahorse also.

So yes Alisandra. If you're listening to this, yes. Mommy ate a sea horse for you and some gross nasty tea that they described as driveway, water runoff. Like that's what it tasted like was disgusting. Like you just went into a gutter and picked up some water. That's what this tea tasted like again did not induce labor.

So. Massage acupressure points, acupuncture, gross tea. And then the last thing I did, which was completely disgusting and probably felt the most little kicks and contractions from it, but nothing like again ever happened was, um, I think it's called Castro oil. Right. Does that sound right? Okay. So I was just like chugging casket oil, like it was Yeager Meister in college know I'm just like jogging it, juggling it, trying to get those contractions again.

And yeah, they did not come. So at that point I'm going to interrupt right there. It has a birth doula. Yeah. For anyone who's listening and wants to try castor oil, don't chug it. Like you were in college. One to two tablespoons of castor oil mixed up in like a smoothie or a milkshake. And I only recommend doing castor oil one time.

Uh, when you do castor oil, multiple times, you end up with diarrhea. I wish I had that as my duel. For the first baby, because I didn't know that. Yeah. I was like, I had the bottle up to my mouth, like drinking castor oil and Frank's like, are you sure? Are you sure you should do this? So I was willing, I was willing.

So I have a question for you too, because one of the things that I want listeners to hear that's really important for natural induction is having sex because there are so many prostoglandins in the CMN that, um, and, and having an orgasm or. It like releases so much oxytocin that that's when a really good day did you, were you comfortable enough to have we had sex all the time?

Yeah. All the time we had sex all the time that did not work either. And you kept walking. What do you mean? Like walking through bent Creek? Yeah. I kept walking and having sex all the time. It did not work. And my, my husband is a Jedi master with orgasms, so that definitely didn't work. So I hope everyone saw on the podcast that this is an explicit podcast.

Yeah. Sorry. We are sisters and I do have a potty mouth sometimes. Um, So, no, none, none of that worked, but I tried everything, but again, I try not to stress too much. What about it? I just didn't. I think I was stressing out at the end there with all these things, because I desperately did not want to be induced.

I did not want to have Pitocin, not want to have to have anything. Injected in my body or the baby's body that could potentially be harmful in my mind, at least, you know, like I I'm like, I just so desperately wanted to have this natural childbirth. Right. And to me, I was like, Oh, if I get Potosi and then it's not a natural childbirth.

Um, but it, it ended up being fine. It ended up being okay. Okay. Okay. So let's talk about that for a minute, because there's going to be so many people that are listening that go over their due date. They know that they have a deadline, that induction is. A possibility. And so many people think the same thing that you think.

And so, so, um, and this is just a side note here. Like I was induced with both of my children as a birth doula and, and my sister was also, and I had a really good experiences with, um, an induction. So I want to maybe talk about like, where that fear of Pitocin comes from. I've heard a lot of myths out there.

And so kind of, do you remember what your perception, like, why you were afraid. Well, my thing is, is I don't want any foreign substance ADI or the baby's body. I mean, I barely even take Advil or Tylenol as a regular person, not even being pregnant. So why would I want something in my veins shooting through and why would I want contractions that were not in there?

Natural conduct tractions in my own head. Like I I'd rather just have the contractions in my body are going to give me and I'll, I'll explain a little bit of that, that one in a second. Cause that was. Different. And then, um, just the environment and setting of the hospital. I wanted to labor, cause I knew I labor was going to be a long process.

I'd rather labor more at home or in the woods than necessarily like sitting in a hospital bed, hooked up to an IV. And if I'm not supposed to eat soft cheese, With the baby inside my belly. I mean, it seems a little strange. I'd be pumping something into me through my veins that would be going to my baby.

I mean, that's what I was thinking. So that's sort of where it came from. But to me, the biggest thing with the Pitocin is got to the hospital like 8:00 AM. And they stuck the needle in my arm. Got it. Going with an IV bag. And, um, it took a while. It was just like chatting in bed. I was like, when is this going to happen?

One of these is going to come back up for a second. What time did you check into the hospital for the induction? So is 8:00 AM checked in at 8:00 AM. If you were listening, I missed the time. Of course, it's like, this is the story of my life. I missed the time. So it was eight o'clock. That would be 8:00 AM.

Okay. So that's a really good, because the city that I'm in, a lot of the providers like to start inductions at night and they bring the moms in at like six o'clock at night. And, um, that's horrible. Know, I feel. Really counterintuitive because I feel like you need a good night's sleep and you need to be rested.

So at another point, we'll bring in a local OB GYN and ask them why they start inductions in sick 6:00 PM. Right now I didn't end up having him until like two o'clock in the morning or something. So I can see. How it might help them out to like start it at night and then maybe they're having a baby by the morning when they're coming on shift again, and they've had a good night's sleep.

Um, but I, I think it was a really smart and good to start at eight and do what we did. Yeah. And then one of the things we missed here is that you did you hired a birth doula? Oh yeah. Sorry. This is a show about Isabelle. She really loves you. She just forgot about you. Yeah. Yeah. So Isabelle, um, was an integral part of this.

So Isabella. Friend massage therapists that I've had for years. And, um, and she had never really done the doula thing before. I don't think, I don't think she had really done it before. And she is just this amazing healing, human being. She just knows so much about human anatomy and how to help you when you're in pain or need to relax with massages and all these things.

And she had, um, I studied all of this cool, um, fertility sort of medicine. And what country you remember what beliefs believes she worked with? Like, uh, A shaman woman and yeah. To learn fertility massage. Yeah. So it was really cool. So, yeah. Anyway, um, I just propose to her, I said, how about being doula? And, um, I started off with some of my readings I had, and then she read up on her own about a lot of different.

Things. And Frank was going to be at the hospital the whole time, but I knew he needed a support person to like, so the three of us kind of were a team at the hospital and she knew it was an induction and she brought like a whole bag full of stuff. And, um, we had a thing of snacks and all kinds of things, but she was there with us through the entire process.

And like I said, 8:00 AM and I didn't have him until after 2:00 AM. I mean, they needed to have a break and like, Have a burger and have a snack themselves and switch in and out of the room, like helping me sometimes and that sort of thing. So she was an amazing doula. That was my first experience with a doula.

I, I would never suggest to anybody to not have a doula, like everybody should have a doula that's given birth, regardless as part of your team. It's not like your only person. I think a lot of people yeah. Misconceptions about what a doula is, but yeah. Support person during birth. So she helped massage me.

She talked to me, she helped keep me calm. She got me I'm out of the room when mom was driving me crazy. Um, so that kind of thing, getting your mom out of the room sometimes is really important. Our mom answered her cell phone while I was pushing my first child out. So thank you, Isabelle. Yeah. So doulas can help it.

Yeah, I think, um, Yeah, everybody was coming in my room, like plugging in their cell phones and bringing their chaos into my room. And I spell us like, yeah, I think she has, she's such a delicate, gentle person. Like she's like, yes, I think this would be really nice if y'all can push this out into the hallway somewhere, you know, so she could do it because you don't have the strength at that point to kind of be your own advocate.

So the doula helps you do that, you know, and I'm an interject right here for any of our very savvy listeners that are like. But, uh, Heidi is a doula. So I was very young, 13 years ago and I, Isabel actually inspired me to become a doula after this. Not me. It wasn't me. No, you had something to do with, I think you gave me a book like the doula book or something, but, um, Probably like being competitive.

Like I was pissed that I didn't get to be or do a lot. I was like, well, I'm definitely going to become one of these magic right. Doulas so that I could be your dual on your next birth. So I was, so I was Sam's, um, doula. She was an amazing doula for pain. So, but Isabelle, I just remember kind of being in the waiting room and thinking whatever this mystical creature is doing.

They're like, yeah. I want it to be her, you know, I want to be healing, you know, my sister. Yeah. I feel like now you correct me if I'm wrong and I know this isn't me interviewing you, but I can't remember the answer to this question. Weren't you doing something around that time where you were helping people in hospice or you're helping people with dying somehow, and then you were like, This connects in the other direction.

I don't know. I just have this like, memory of that in my head a hundred percent. No, I don't even injured person. Cause you're like, Oh, I want to be on the other side of it on the birth side. No, I mean, I was like a drug rep that was like helping people with their medicine. So maybe, but no, I have a few friends that were giving birth that I had.

Like kind of helped through there before I became a doula like that. I had helped. And so I, I thought I knew what I was doing, but without doula training, but yeah. Okay. I did not know what I was doing back then. So back to your birth. Okay. So you check in at eight o'clock in the morning, Isabel's got the room set up, like your husband's there.

Um, they get the IV started with the Pitocin and then kind of what happens. Now, we're going to take a short break to just share a few things with you and we'll be right back with our guests.

So excited to tell you about my first book that I wrote. That is launching this summer. It's a 42 week guide to your pregnancy. It's a collection of birth stories. It has a ton of doula advice from all of the questions that my clients have asked me over the last 14 years. It has hysterical partner tips that you will want to read to your partner.

And it has journaling prompts because nobody has time to write a 20 pages in their journal about their pregnancy. So I've taken the Liberty to give you some prompts of things that I think you might want to remember back on after the baby's born. So again, you can go to birth story.com and preorder a copy today, and it would mean the world to me.

If you're enjoying this podcast, then I need your help to spread the word. If you know anyone who is pregnant is trying to become pregnant or just loves a good birth story. If you could send them to iTunes or Stitcher or Spotify or SoundCloud, wherever they listen to their podcasts and ask them to subscribe to the birth story podcast.

So back to your birth. Okay. So you check in at eight o'clock the morning, Isabel's got the room set up, like your husband's there. Um, they get the IV started with the Pitocin and then kind of what happens. Oh, um, I had, uh, let me set the scene for you. I put pictures of my grandmother and my grandfather on the window sill summoning their healing spirits cause they had passed and just there to help help me through the labor process.

You know, we had some good sense going on in the room. Um, Isabel brought me some. Um, ice pops, you know, to have during labor. And then the contractions started, um, eventually it took a few hours. It didn't, it wasn't like immediate. It took a few hours for the Pitocin to kick in and they step started messing with it, turning it up and down and everything.

And after I've now had two bursts, I can compare the differences between the natural contractions and Pitocin. And I think the really hard part about Pitocin. Is because they're having to adjust it to your body. Um, There, there are a lot of times, right on top of one another. So you'll have a contraction and then just one deep breath and then another one starts.

Whereas with natural contractions, you'll have a contraction. You know, you have the squeezing of the muscles. And then you have like 60 seconds, usually, um, 30 seconds at least to like breathe to calm down a little bit and then go into the next one. So it gives you a little bit more space in between contractions.

Um, and again, maybe if they had discipline. Done the Pitocin a little bit differently, and maybe there would have been more space, but that was a hard part for me, but I, I forgot to say it. I also toured the hospital. I had a time and, um, had seen that they had birth chairs now. I think they had shoved in some closet far away where they didn't really want to get them out for people.

They thought it was a little weird. I got the feeling. Um, but I knew they were there cause I had done the birth tour and I had asked those questions. So when we first got there, I asked if they would get the birth chair out of the club. And one lady, one of the nurses looked to the other birth chair and then it, so that process of finding the birth chair probably took an hour or two, just FYI.

Yeah. So note to self, when you're touring the hospital and you see really cool things like a birthing ball or a peanut ball or a birth chair, like make sure you have in your birth plan or your doula or your partner or something knows. You know what you want, that environment or that room to look like.

Um, you don't have to worry about any of those things. If you hire a doula, right. They'll do it all for you. You know what, and that is a good point because Isabel was tracking all that down for me. So I didn't have to really mess with that. And I wasn't really having a contractions. I didn't need her yet.

You know, and she was out in the hallway finding the Burt chair for everything organized, you know, so for everyone that's listening, that is like, what is a birthday? Yeah. Okay. So there's going to be a lot of people that have no idea. So talk about like what a birth chair is. Well, I, you may be able to talk about it better than I can, but I can describe it from my point of view.

Is it kind of looked like. An old person's Walker is what it looked like to me. And like with the little chair part, it had a very thin rim that you could sit kind of sit down in your Walker kind of thing. So I'm holding on to metal bars on the side, but I'm sitting. Now, um, and it's kind of like a squat sit.

I it's like a low set. Yeah. Um, cause I had read that that reduces your, um, birth canal and makes it easier for the baby to come out. And I wanted everything that would make it easier. And so it had like a small room, I would say it wasn't the most comfortable birth chair in the world. The one that. They had, but at that point it was great because it was support.

I did not want to be in the bed. I did not want to be confined. And my husband was able to get in a chair behind me and kind of envelop me with his arms and support my back and rubbed my back and that sort of thing. Like while I was laboring, Okay. So would you describe it any differently or? Yeah, I would describe it as like a toilet seat.

That's not on a toilet. Yeah. I still has like a hole in it, so it kind of gravity lets maybe my butt just felt so big that it felt like it was like a one millimeter rim all around, but it just kind of helps. You know, with gravity. So everybody is listening. So, uh, squat, squat, squat, squat, squat, like we can't say it enough, right?

Like sit in your chair, sit on your ball. But squat, squat, squat, because it actually really does help to get the baby to move down, to get in a good position, to put pressure on that cervix, to open the cervix, um, to work with gravity. When you are laying flat on a bed on your back, um, labor just takes longer.

So, yeah, and I would say the best way that I could explain again, this is if you're laying down, if you've got a shit, if you got poop. Okay. Okay. Am I allowed to say that? Yeah. Okay. Okay. So if you've got a shit and somebody said, Oh, you have to shit. Why don't you lay down in the bed to shit? Why don't you, why don't you do that?

Imagine laying in your bed, on your back. And then trying to shit. Of course, that makes sense. No sense. Not that a baby is a shit, but it feels like that sometimes. So like it's much better to be like sitting, squatting, whatever, because then you're in a position that just, like you said, gravity, it makes more sense and it feels better.

Yeah. So it's sort of, to me archaic, like laying in a bed because that's not what. It's the easiest position. So at this point in your labor, you're still all natural in the sense that the only medical intervention is a Pitocin drip. Yes. Right. And did you have an IV bag of fluids? Yeah, too. So an IB bag of fluids.

And if it goes in drip and you, your husband is massaging you and you're sitting in the birth chair, Isabel, I think is massaging all over your whole body to talk to me about how your ma what you're doing with your mind, when the contractions hit. Um, well, I, I was doing all these visions realizations, and I had, I forgot this part too.

It's been so long hypnobirthing. I had gone to some hypnobirthing classes with a hypnotherapist and there was like a trigger word that Frank and I came up with. And then he touched my shoulder at a certain point when he would see that I was struggling. And it was basically just a relaxation. Mode to get into.

And so that would help me then relax even further. But in my mind, I just pictured. I would just kind of had mantras in my head. Like I'm so excited to see Allesandro. I think I had one that was like, my, my flower of my birth canal is opening like a beautiful flower. So I kept just imagining like my vagina opening bigger and bigger to let the baby out.

And I also did just was breathing. I wasn't trying to struggle against the contractions because. I'm telling you, having a baby for the first time is a weird experience. And I was not prepared. I had read a million books. I am like a researcher. I had read everything. I could, every first person that count every medical thing.

I read it all, but it's still, you still. Don't know what it's like until you actually go through it. And to me it was like, birth is like Paracelsus, you know, like with a snake. And the snake is like doing those, like contraction things to like get the food down in, you know, so that, to me, it's like Paris salsas, like the contractions, get your baby out.

And if you like. Are trying to like push really hard and it does doesn't work. You just have to give into it, give over to it, just like you do an orgasm by the way as just let go. It's like, when you let go and you breathe and you give into the experience of this baby, trying to crawl out of your body, which is a strange experience to think about right.

Then it just goes more easily. And then I think I told you this whole thing to have. You know, like the whole taking the shit on the bed, like thing and being laying down that doesn't make any sense. Now let's take taking a shit to the toilet. Okay. If you're on the toilet and you are trying to poop. Okay.

And you're like, Hey, and you're trying to poop it, it doesn't happen. You'll be there forever. Like, but if you just.

Breathe, your poop out, you breathe. Your poop out is a brewery then, and you breathe out the pupil, come out. Same thing with the baby. If you will just be calmer and actually given to the experience and like breathe in and out. At least for me, I mean, I'm saying there's like a worst for everybody, but for me helped a lot.

So you had a really long labor, essentially. So if you started at eight o'clock in the morning, you didn't deliver until, um, two o'clock. In the morning, the next day. Yeah. There was some altered States of consciousness going on. Right. So you had mentioned that you didn't want to like put all these toxins or anything else in your body.

So I'm assuming that you, in your mind, you were like, I'm definitely where you, like, I'm definitely not getting an epidural or were you open to getting an epidural? Um, well I did not want to have an epidural, but I was definitely open to. Whatever is going to keep this baby safe. I mean, if they would've come in and said, we need your right arm, we need to cut it off to make the baby safe.

I'd be like, go for it, take my arm. So I was kind of have the attitude of whatever they think is going to keep the baby safe, keep Alessandra safe. I'm totally willing to do so you had a team you totally trust. Yeah. And, but I didn't want. And the doula Isabel helped with this. I didn't want to be constantly offered cause they kind of do this thing where they come to your room and offer you like epidurals and stuff or whatever.

And Isabella was kind of like my defensive line, man, you know, who would go up to them and be like, ah, don't bring that stuff up to her right now. Like she's doing great. Okay. Um, so at what point do you think that things started to really intensify? Do you have a concept of. The timeframe. I don't have a concept of the timeframe, but they videoed everything for me.

And that's another good reason to have some support people in the room. I'm so Isabel and Frank video videoed everything. So there's this some crazy video he knows of me. Like  like my head, like going around and I was making lots of, um, deep own moaning. Sounds like. I don't even know if I could just like, huh?

Do you think your listeners would like that? Yeah, hopefully that doesn't sound like your contraction. So those deep sounds were like really helping and I had done some prenatal yoga where they said that you making those deep sounds actually helps to open up. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Wow. That's a gutter like opening sound that you'll hear a lot from laboring women.

Yeah. So, and I, so I knew that it was relaxing to me. It worked for me and I had my eyes closed a lot during labor and I was just. In another world, I was in another place, but the touch of people really helped. The massaging helped. Um, for me during pregnancy, like pressure on my back, moving around, getting up and walking around the room, all of those things helped me.

Um, my least favorite thing would probably be, be the heart monitor that they put across your belly when you're in the middle of labor, at least for me, that was a pain. The cause it just, it felt. So heavy and like restrictive and like annoying. Did they constantly monitor you like that monitor was on and it, well, I mean, not at 8:00 AM, but when I was getting pretty heavy into the.

Yeah into the contractions, then it was on for hours an hour. So yeah. So while it can be annoying, I think it's really important to talk about the importance of that heart monitor though. So especially when you have, um, like the artificial Pitocin or any kind of medical intervention, they just want to make sure that the baby is doing okay.

So they're looking for a celebrations decelerations, but that the babies, um, You know, heart rate response to the constructions is doing okay. So did you find any comfort in that, like knowing that he had no, not at all, because it just scared me to death because it was like a big seatbelt across my tummy.

Like as a stretchy type elder tightening, every time there was a contraction and there's a big device in the middle. And so all the time they were like, heart rate is decelerating high, ready to see celebrating. And they're like freaking out about stuff, which then freaks you out. If nothing's. Going on really?

And in my head, all he kept saying to myself was Alessandra was fine. Of course the heart rates are going to decelerate when I'm like pushing or, you know, he's trying to get out of there. Yeah. It's a tough job to get out of somebody's vagina. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I wasn't worried and think goodness is about, and Frank are really like the most calm people in the world.

So. I wasn't worried, but I can see how for other people too, like it stressed me out a little bit, that they were so concerned with it. And I just knew somehow in my head, everything was fine. But so I hear, um, when people don't see the decelerations. You'll hear moms that will say that, Oh, I could, I could look over and see that the baby was doing fine.

And that was comforting to me. But because does that happen where people give birth and like it doesn't decelerate at all? Um, yeah, if they have a quicker labor's too. So that's a good note. We can step in right now and say that like, um, when there is compression, To the baby's head. You will, as the baby's coming through the birth canal, we will see heart decelerations.

Um, if the cord is wrapped at all, you'll see some decelerations. There are some, uh, many other reasons to have heart accelerations or decelerations, but as long as they're short and they bounce back, um, the medical community seems to not. You know, they watch it. Um, but they're not overly concerned when you see a deceleration with a contraction, when the baby's coming through the birth canal, that's typically considered to be pretty a normal thing to witness on a, on a heart rate strip.

So, so you saw that with Alessandra. So as he was coming down, he was in the birth canal. Yeah. The head was getting compressed. There were some heart decelerations, but you were not scared by those. So those were, that was good that you just knew intuitively like your baby was doing fine. And, um, so talk about the birth.

So, so the birth part, um, uh, was exciting. He has a nickname turtle to this day because he was like, Oh no, I want to go back in out. No, I want to go back in with this little head. So I still call him turtle. Um, but so. The thing that was a little bit hard as my physician, I think had had a, like a hard. Night, um, that night of whatever was going on at the hospital and talk about it.

I think it's important. You don't talk about her, but she had a tough night. Yeah. Yeah. So I was on the birth cheer and originally, you know, I had a birth plan and everything, and she was totally fine with me giving birth on the birth chair and she'd get down on the floor and like deliver the baby. And we had talked all the way through, but it's now like, Two 30 in the morning, whatever.

And she comes into the room and it's getting close and she's just like Sam. I've had a really hard night here at the hospital. I just want everything to be safe for you and Alessandra. I need you to be on the bed. So I will tell you that my contractions. Really, I swear to God, they did not hurt nothing hurt about labor.

It was just weird, like a baby's crawling out of you. Weird until I laid down on the bed. And then when I laid down on the bed, my back was killing me. Um, my vagina, like when he was coming out, I tore that was horrible, you know, whatever. But I, I really do fault it with like laying down on the bed instead of being able to give birth on the birth chair.

But later on, I found out that there was like a. A young child, basically an 11 year old that night who had given birth. And I think she was part of, of my physician was part of that whole process. And so she had just had it, you know, mentally and probably physically hard time and just wanted everything to be safe for me and Alessandra.

And it was, she's an excellent physician. So, um, So pushing them out. It took while to get them out. I kind of think of it as like carving the grand Canyon. Your first baby out is like carving the grand Canyon for the babies to come, you know, the future baby. So the first one, man, it's a little harder for them.

It was a little harder for Alisandra to get out of there. And had to turn and shoulder and everything and get out, but he eventually did, um, a PCI to me, but you tore naturally. Yeah. Tore naturally. And I wanted to, cause I had read up that, um, tearing naturally and healing is actually better than having like a straight line kind of, um, scalpel cut.

I just read that. So some research on that, so tore naturally, but I bled a bunch. So. Alessandra comes out. I'm so excited. He's so cute. Okay. And you didn't bleed from the tearing. You were bleeding from a postpartum hemorrhage. I have no clue. I have no clue, but maybe I more common since I don't know your medical history, I'm going to guess you had a postpartum hemorrhage.

Okay. Because. Um, let's let me just do a little tea doula teaching right here is the one. Um, so just, even if you didn't know, this is that your uterus is a muscle and when you, we labor naturally, and you talked about, we have those long breaks in between. Like, so sometimes there'll be in labor and you'll have like a 20 minute break in between contractions, even when you're really.

You know, far along, but that when we have Pitocin and it's just conjunction, contraction, congestion, and conjunction, and you had what, a 16 hour labor, um, something like that, that, that muscle is tired. So then after the baby is expelled from the uterus, that muscle, it needs to continue to contract in order to deliver the placenta, but also, um, so that you don't.

Continue to bleed in hemorrhage. And sometimes that muscle is worn out and it's so tired. So you, it, uh, so they all interview a medical professional on the statistics here. Um, but it is very common. I would say I hear stories and I'm not a lot of clients myself included, uh, where there was a postpartum hemorrhage, um, because of a really tired.

Muscle the uterus after giving birth. So one of my nurses, this is kind of a funny story. One of my nurses was like seven or eight months pregnant. I mean, she was huge. She had a huge belly and she was so sweet. So right after I gave birth to Alison, um, and they were like working on them, all the nurses are doing like the app Gar scores and seeing how healthy is and stuff.

Um, they were like, we need you to go to the restroom. Like we need to go to the bathroom or whatever. So I passed out. I passed out because I had lost so much blood and I said, I'm about to pass out. And she said, just lean into me. So I felt so bad. What am I going to feel so bad? And then I passed out right on her belly.

Holding her. She's just like, hold on to me. And I pass on her belly and she's holding onto me. And then she's like, can you take a couple more steps to the toilet? And I took a couple more steps and a passed out again. And then when I got to the toilet, I passed out again. So I think they, and I kept just leaning into her big, beautiful belly.

It was kind of beautiful, actually. Nice. Um, I felt bad though. And they gave me some sort of medicine, I think, to stop the bleeding of what was going on. But I forgot to tell you the other part of the story is with the two. Weeks of, um, being overdue and their minds. Right? One of the things my doctor said is your placenta can calcify and that could be add, cause you're not getting nutrients to your baby and all that kind of thing.

So yeah. As soon as the placenta came out after Allison. . I was like, show me that placenta. Cause I was taking the placenta home anyway. And I was like, show me that placenta and show me those calcifications. So the doctor, she held it up to me and showed me. And there were these like little white spots.

They look like white spots on there and she's like, it's not a ton, but there are white spots on here showing calcification of the placenta, which is apparently not a good thing. Um, so that's one of the reasons apparently that they induce. Yep. So, and so I think some of the listeners that may be listening are.

Um, like to go back to the beginning, like being afraid of an induction or like not wanting to have an induction, but here is Sam telling this amazing story that said the is calcified. There was an urgency maybe to have had this induction and you still had a completely natural childbirth. Like you never got the epidural.

You never had any other medical interventions. Besides that Pitocin an IV drip, even with a really long. You know, LIBOR. So tell us how much did Alisandra weigh. Okay. I really should have looked at this before I came for the interview, but I want to say he was like six pounds. 12 ounces, something like that.

He was right in that range. Yeah. So, I mean, in most standards, I was like, it's a pretty tiny baby. So I think semi belly was enormous though. I was like, are there other babies in there? Because I swear this baby was going to be huge. We have short torsos in our family. So, so yes. So you okay. I had a big belly, but it's cause you have a short torso.

Okay. I was like, darn it I've gained 50 pounds, but this guy is only six 12. What am I going to do? So you gained 50 pounds too. So healthy, normal date. Sometimes they say 25 to 30 for those. People listening. I'm sure I'm going to say it over and over again. I gained 70 pounds. I don't necessarily recommend it cause it's really hard to get it off afterwards, but it happens.

Yeah. I'm still trying and that child's 13. So it happens, you know? Um, so let's talk about just those like moments, like right after our birth. Like, so, because it was natural, did you get a chance to like, hold him right away and nurse right away? Like how did that go? Oh yeah. So exciting. So, um, did skin to skin contact right away and, um, had him up on my, my belly at first and then Frank got to cut the cord too.

So that was really cool. And they waited for the cord to like pull out everything and he was just so cute. And I just, I couldn't believe he came out of me and this little love and the like, love in your heart for this. This human being like, how did a human being come out of the inside of me and how can I love this human being like more than life itself?

And it was just overwhelming, but I could just kept looking at Frank and then looking at us, Andrew and like, Oh my gosh, look what we did. Like, look, look, look, look what our love did. Like. That is just insane to me that like, you can love someone so much that you can create a life from your love. I mean, it's pretty a pretty profound experience.

Yup. Nurse right away. Apgar score was good. I don't remember what it was, but, um, yeah, it was, he was a great little help. The little thing and, and, and beautiful birth. Yes. Awesome. So, um, one of the things I like to ask the moms is like, did you have a favorite. Product that you used when you were pregnant or after pregnant, or like when.

Um, that you registered for, that you got, but do you have a favorite baby product? Um, I would not say any particular baby product, but the store target has always been my saving grace and, um, ladies listening out there who are pregnant or about to give birth or have given birth, they open at 8:00 AM. That is key.

Most places are not open at 8:00 AM and I'm talking like every day they're open at 8:00 AM. So. I just would have to get out of the house. So I would bring the baby with me and it was a place to go and I'd get like some Starbucks and be walking around with my chai tea and my baby. And it gave me a place indoors that was safe.

Didn't matter what the weather was to just walk around and look at things and figure out what products I needed. Because, let me tell you I needed stuff all the time. So at target I'm like, Oh, it's pretty in here. It's clean. Oh, here's some clothes for the baby. Here's some cream that I need from my nipples.

Like, like they have it. Yeah. Oh, like everything you need and this calm because no, one's there at eight again. Um, so it's a really easy place, you know, and. To go in the morning. So that's what I am a favorite baby product was all of target, targeted Starbucks. I'm telling you they saved my life. I don't do you still go to target and stuff?

I still on Saturday and Sunday, it's just my routine. I like go, I go walk in the woods for like an hour and then I go to target. In the morning to see what I need and I have my Starbucks. Yeah. It's my routine. Awesome. Okay. Well, for anyone listening that like loves Sam and wants to, um, hear about her second birth, we're going to have a part two where she talks about her birth, where Heidi was my doula.

Yay. And she had an all natural childbirth, uh, with Peyton. So, um, look for that episode and I will put it in this episode's notes. So thanks everybody for listening. Thanks Sam, for being on intelligence. You're awesome. I love you. That'd be too.

Thank you for listening to birth story, Michael is you'll walk away from each episode with a clear picture of how labor and delivery might go, and that you will feel empowered by the end of your pregnancy to speak up plan and prepare for the birth you want. No matter what that looks like.