21 Heidi on Being an International Doula in a Ugandan Adoption Birth Story

 
 
 

This episode hits close to home for Birth Story Podcast host Heidi as it regales the adoption story of one of her closest friends, Rachelle, for whom she was the adoption doula. This story will give you goosebumps so settle in for a wild ride spanning more than 3 years, $90,000, and learn how the adoption of a single child expanded into the fight to bring home two.

For more information on Kidron Valley Orphanage or donating to their non-profit JoPri please follow @jopriuganda or visit: www.jopri.org

Looking for a Virtual Doula to create a custom birthing experience and guide you through your journey to parenthood in the United States? Contact Heidi at www.mydoulaheidi.com

For additional free birth education resources and to purchase Heidi’s book, Birth Story: Pregnancy Guidebook + Journal, visit www.birthstory.com.

Want to share your thoughts on the episode? Leave a review and send a message directly to Heidi on Instagram.

 
 

TRANSCRIPTION

What does a contraction feel like? How do I know if I'm in labor and what does the day of labor look like? Wait, is this normal? Hey, I'm Heidi Campbell, a certified birth doula host of this podcast, birth story and owner of my doula, Heidi. I have supported hundreds of women through their labor and deliveries.

And I believe that every one of them and you deserves a microphone and a stage. So here we are listen each week to get answers to these tough questions and more birth story, where we talk about pregnancy labor deliveries, where we tell our stories, share our feelings, and of course chat about our favorite baby products and motherhood.

And because I'm passionate about birth outcomes. You will hear from some of the top experts in labor and delivery, whether you are pregnant, trying desperately to get pregnant. I hope you will stick around and be part of this tribe. Episode 21 today's episode is an international adoption story. We talk with Rochelle and she and her husband, Pete adopted two toddlers from Genji, Uganda, and Africa.

Originally they just plan for one. So this is a really cool story on how they ended up with two children from the kid drawn Valley orphanage. I try to walk you through a step by step guide on where you might start, if you're interested in international adoption and how it might go. This particular story is very near and dear to my heart as I was their adoption doula.

And if you've been listening for a while, you know that I have a book coming out, a portion of the proceeds from each book sold are going to fund the teacher salaries at this beautiful orphanage in Ginja Uganda. This story changed my life and I hope it might change yours too. So ready? Yeah, I'm ready.

She can interject, like, you know, when you hear a rap song and then someone's in the background and it's like big Popo, like junior mafia, what? Like she could do it. Yeah. Well, let's just go on that. So Rochelle right now, or on the birth story podcast. And we have Rochelle that we're interviewing, but, um, big Papa in the background that she's referring to is my best friend, Megan, who is cohost.

Dang the morning today for the first time, this is really exciting. Just let's give everybody that's listening a little background. Um, this was a little bit of a hard week for me, and it was the first time I was going to be without my children for eight days, which anyone who's listening in is pregnant.

It's probably like, could, you know, probably can't imagine that unless you have older children, but I was thinking, Oh, I don't know how I'm going to be away from my kids for eight days, which now is like, I mean, we're all having kind of a good time without only minimal funds about our children. But my bestie, Megan, since we were 10 years old from Florida showed up on my doorstep and there's an Epic video on Instagram and Facebook, my reaction to this.

So I have a cohost woo, who might know more than a mother of five big Poppa. Here's your wounded like birth? Word that she could blurt out in the middle of every now. And then I just want you to say push placenta, push it real good. So there's no singing in this plug in all seriousness. Hello everybody. Uh, on the podcast today, we are talking adoption and what's really cool.

Is. I happened to have been Rochelle's doula for her birth and her birthday story is going to be featured in my book that's coming out. Yeah. And so I'm really excited about that, but after she had two babies, she went on to adopt two more. So we have. Tons of questions for you. And we really want to honor all the ways in which we become parents and including through adoption.

And so welcome. Thank you. Good morning everybody. Good morning. I will say we've already had our CA it's like really early in the morning and we've already ever copied it, worked out or having a pretty good mom day. Yeah. You know, Rochelle, let's start at the very beginning. My beginning of this story was sitting on your couch, nursing our babies.

And I was like, Oh, are you gonna have another one? What did I say? You were? Well, you were kind of already deep into the adoption. Like I just kind of getting caught up. Yeah. And so start us at the very beginning. Did you always know you wanted to adopt? I did not. Um, I'd say the very beginning would be when I'm sure you'll remember, we traveled back and forth to Africa doing ambassadors and stuff.

It. And when we went back the second time and had Pete with us, we went to that one orphanage that had the little boy with the  and every time he kicked the soccer ball, he would blow it. And I think that really was the first time Pete and I started talking about orphans and adoption and what it might look like to adopt from Africa, I guess I should have probably started there.

So Rochelle and I were. Can I call ourselves international soccer players. I think it's fair. Yeah. So we played on an international soccer team. We did play a national team. I don't remember. Yeah. Oh, it was, but that's we played on them. No, we played against the women's national team in South Africa. Yeah. I know this is the birth story podcast, but this all is relevant.

So we're shell and I were international soccer players. We went and played with ambassadors in sport. And a year later after when we had worked in all of these orders, , we're just kind of covered in children. It was such a good way to say it. Yeah, it was really an amazing you'd walk into an orphanage and they were just.

Yeah, we were covered in children. It was so beautiful. I mean, they just wanted to touch our skin and our hair was so different. They would chant to me next or me now, I can't remember. And they'd want to just keep jumping on you. And there was like a hundred lined up waiting to just touch shouldn't be held.

And, and so I was wondering if it was on the first trip or the second trip. So a year later the seed was probably planted early. Yeah. I was going to say, I feel like you were kind of in your. You were in your group. And a year later we decided to come back, but we decided to bring like everyone, we knew that played soccer.

It was kind of Epic. Cause it was the 2010 world that was also world cup. I was like, it was 2010 world cup. So we kind of went back to South Africa with all of our. Soccer playing friends on that trip on the way there. Yeah. Day. We always joke. We're like not the wedding, not having kids. It was the best day of my life.

Because in that same day, we got engaged in Madrid on like, I don't know what you call that. A layover very lonely over. It was a day long layover. And then I remember arriving and everybody was already at the stadium and we came to me. Meet you guys. And we were like totally done up with all the face paint.

And I just remember you being like 20 rows up yelling my shower and you were like willing. And I held up my hand with the rig and you were like, I was like, yes. And then Landon Donovan scored the most amazing goal ever. Like, wait, we cannot do this podcast without honoring land and Donovan's goal. Oh, it was such an incredible, it was such an incredible soccer match in overtime.

It was, I mean, I don't think my body has ever shook. Like it's amazing thing ever. And if you're not a soccer failure, probably like, what are you talking about? So on this trip, you, we went to this one particular orphanage and I, we have some pictures I'll put up on our Instagram and Facebook feed of this little boy with the

I have this picture hanging in our house. Um, uh, it was just so incredible and we did a lot of dancing and a lot of singing and a lot of playing and a lot of touching and a lot of holding with many orphans. And so the seed was kind of planted. Yep. So did you guys start talking about it or was it just kind of in your hearts, um, as you planned your wedding and having kids, he did start talking about it.

It was funny because that was one thing that always. Excited me or drew me to Pete was the fact that he wasn't scared to talk about serious things like before being engaged. You know, we talked about having kids and the possibility of adoption. And then once we really, you know, committed to each other and knew we were getting married, we full on discussed, you know, what our family would look like often.

And I think we knew from the start, even when having Brecken that we were going to adopt down the road, did you always know that you wanted to have biological children first and then adopt next. No, but I do think once we had, and I knew I wanted to have one more or at least before we adopted. Okay. Was broken a planned pregnancy your first?

Yes. Okay. So you have, and how old is he? Seven. And then you have another. Tuck. And how old is he healed? Tuck stir. He is five. Okay. Seven and five. How old were they when you decided we are going to go for adoption rather than another biological child? I think almost four and almost two. Okay. So I guess that's three in one.

Yeah, that's a fancy way to say it. So when they were three and one. Sometime around there, we were sitting on the couch taking care of our babies and you know, of course I asked the question, no one should ever ask, like, when are you having another baby? Like right after I should, no one should ever, when you are behind we'll will ask it.

Yes. So when you're holding, are you having another one? Yeah, I did ask that. And you were like, actually we have started the adoption, the process, look at us. Does that take me on that? I don't even know, like, how do you, what do you do call somebody? Do you get on the Google haul? Thanks. All the technologies.

We, um, Knew that we wanted to adopt. So we started researching and we found out that a lot of the places like a lot of countries in Africa closed down to adoption, or it was it's really limited. Like you could only adopt kids above a certain age or with special needs. So at first we had to whittle it down or figure out which countries were viable options to adopt from, because we did want to adopt at least with the first, um, A younger child.

And so we found out that it was between Uganda and Ethiopia and ironically, we were like, we'll go with you, go into, cause it's a shorter Taiwan. And then all of the laws changed. You'll hear about that midway through. Um, so that time it was easier to adopt from Uganda than it was from Ethiopia, but for the whole continent Africa, Americans could have from like Ghana, South Africa, Ethiopia, Uganda, and there might've been one more.

But all the other places had to be special needs children of a certain age or above. And those were longer timelines as well. So as soon as we knew it was Uganda, we started looking for adoption agencies that had a program for Uganda. And so the very first one I found that I really liked and had looked over all the information on the webpage, had a webinar that night when I was looking.

And I was like, Oh my gosh, like, let's check this out tonight. So I remember logging in and. Pete. And I like, nerdily sitting up against the laptop, like listening and asking questions here and there. And we pretty much got all of our questions answered and there were other families on the inside of me in the right word.

Now it might be like a Moodle or it was a Bernard, I think. And then at the end of it, we close the computer and. Talked a little went to bed and the next morning we're like, so you're ready to do it. And we're both like, yup. And so I just called and started the process, which is a lengthy one because you know, there's a lot of paperwork.

And the very first thing we had to start on immediately was our home study. So that takes about four to six months to do a home study where you have like a social worker who comes and visits your home. There's tons of like background checks and they want to, you know, meet your children and. Learn about everyone that's in the household and what your values are.

And you write like an autobiography about your family and you trace back your own history of like how you grew up and what your parenting beliefs are. All the stuff. There's a lot of psychology involved in it. Okay. So let's. Pause rewind. If someone is listening to this podcast and they have a seed inside of them for adoption, what would you recommend?

Be the starting point, regardless of where they're going to adopt, but we're specifically addressing international adoption today. So where would someone start? You get to a webinar? Very first thing you're going to have to do is go online and find, um, Different agencies that would be a good fit for you.

And so some are religion based and some aren't and some are like happened to be local and was within our state. But you really can adopt, like if you had, you know, you were East coast and you saw a California adoption agency that met all the needs, they had a program you liked and you lined up with the values and the timelines.

Good. You could still use them. Okay. So you really just need to find an agency that has the program you're looking for. So like I say that because ours, um, our agency ended up adding two other countries, like Burundi is one they just added. And so it's always changing, like the countries that you can adopt from let's play a game where in the world is Burundi, who knows.

Um, tell me I'm going to take prophecy in Africa, but I don't know which part you use out. I've got a one  East. I was just wondering how smart we were. Those rural were now that's not push button over here. We all just did a thumbs down. So the first step would be find an adoption agency with the adoption agency.

Like I'm assuming you have to have a lawyer. Okay. The lawyer like me personally, or did the agency, I didn't have to have a, you didn't have to have a lawyer. No, but really the first thing I did, sorry, that was like a lie. I talked to other people who had adopted, um, and really pick their brain about certain things and what the home study was going to be like and things like that.

Then I went and found an agency. We did not have a lawyer. Um, you end up getting a social worker and like a case manager. It feels like something legal to me to see. This is good. This is why we're doing the podcast. It's not as legal as maybe legal later. Okay. Five times past legal legal later, later. Hi you.

This is so good. Okay. So step one and international adoption, find mentorship, a tribe, a group, maybe like on Facebook or Instagram, follow some hashtags. Yeah. Get a group of people that can talk to you about what their experience was like. Um, later I'm going to ask you, are you now a mentor for other people, but more on this podcast?

So I guess the answer is yes. Um, then get on Google and, or, or Yahoo or whatever your, and you can ask the people that you've talked to. Like people suggested the one that I was researching. Okay. That's always like a really. Credible source or, um, referrals, but find an agency that fits you. Yes. Cause there's so many nuances and little things you have to know, and only an agency is going to be able to tell you all of it, those things.

And then what I heard from you was buckled down and pair for months. Of paper work and home study tell you that. And you think, you know it, but it's really difficult because your end game and goal is like, you'd want to adopt this child. And it's almost like for at least six months. Yeah. You can't even really consider.

Are they alive? Have they been born dead? You know? So what was the age range you were desiring to adopt? We applied for birth to two birth to two, and then they care about the sex of the baby. So that is, they ask you all these different questions and that goes into your home study. So they ask if you want multiple siblings, what gender are you okay with disabilities?

And we said, yes. We're okay. With disabilities birth to two. I think we might have specified that we prefer to mail, but we're open. Okay. So then. What happens if you're doing international four to six months of this home study in this ward, what happens as soon as you're done, you know, if it's going to be international, then you need to immediately start getting all of your documents.

Um, there's two things for immigration, cause you need to get approved. To be able to bring a child home. And at this point I've literally, it's almost like birth. I blacked it all out there. I don't remember the form numbers and all that, but there's forms you fill out and you get approval. And at the same time you submit something called a dossier, which is basically the fact that your home study is done.

They submit many copies, uh, notarized copies of your home study, along with a zillion documents of like your finances and your backup. Ground checks. And depending what country like ours, you know, religion was a part of the criteria. Like you had to have a letter from your pastor and things like that.

Okay. Oh, I have so many questions. When did you have to pay money to someone for, cause I know adduction is not free, but like, do you like right away to pay this agency to pay? And that money went directly to the like the social workers. Not company, but like wherever they worked out of, okay. You had to pay.

And I want to say that was like two to three, a hundred dollars. Um, so not anything huge compared to what you would later pay. And I want you to break that down for us because I want to be able to set realistic expectations for people that are listening on the financial. And then we. So the real reason, like it would be great to start are with the agency is because they will send you a breakdown from start to finish with a timeline of how much it is total, but like what each part is spent on.

And when it's Dubai, you know, adoption can cost even domestically, anywhere from 20 grand to 40 grand total. But then when you're going international and you incorporate travel, it can be around 60 a thousand dollars. And then if you have multiple, like for us, when we decided. To dot Priscilla. It just essentially doubled it minus a few things that you only pay one time.

Okay. So we'll get to the money stuff later, but just like, let's kind of throw it out there. Overall. Start to finish. What did it end up costing to adopt two children from Uganda? A guess for me, that's pretty close would probably be 85 to 90,000. Okay. And that includes all your plane tickets and everything, but that includes everything.

I'd say the actual fees would probably have been maybe like 50 to 60,000, but then all the flights and the court and like we had to pay to foster them. So we paid money every month. Because you had to foster them for a certain period of time. So you had to pay for like all of them, food clothes, medical education, education school.

Yeah. Okay. So take a deep breath, everybody that just heard that number, right. Because, um, Rochelle, what do you do for a living? Um, I'm in education. And what does your husband do for a living he's in social work and nonprofit. Okay. So a teacher. In a nonprofit social worker found a way to get 85 to $90,000 to bring their two beautiful children home.

And one of the things I want to talk about later in the podcast is creative and generous fundraising. Yes, please. Don't let money stop you. If you want to do it, it will not be an issue. The money will come. I was going to say, that's just one thing I want to Rangers from, um, like on the outside, you know, I've never adopted, but being part of watching you guys do this as watching people show up with generosity and wanting to really contribute to make this possible for anyone, regardless of what your baseline.

Yes. I want to emphasize that. Do not let money be. Yeah, the restriction or the reason you don't do it, so well, let's go get to the good stuff. So the health studies done. Yes. And at what point did you know it was going to be Uganda and possibly like, how did that matching? You're taking me back now to places I have not traveled in a while in my mind, so, Oh, which interject, you mentioned earlier that this is kind of like.

Being pregnant and birth. And let's honor that for anyone who is adopting or has adopted and has never given birth, it is so similar. Yeah. Like the, the process of trying to get pregnant. And then the process of being pregnant, joy being enriched is like finding out. You have, you are pregnant and like what the sex is and never knowing what day you're going to go into labor or what the outcome will even be.

Exactly. It, there are so many parallels to the adoption process to adjust labor and becoming a parent is becoming a parent. It's a journey, you know, and, and it looks very different for everybody, but there are so many parallels. I know you said you blacked out some of it it's coming back slowly but surely.

So here's what I'm just going to keep, keep going with the coffee. So they, um, this is what they say they do. And I remember being like, How could they really do this? And I was telling someone this the other day, so funny, they take your auto buy art, like the story you wrote about your life in your family.

And then they have, for us in our agency, they had five different orphanages that they worked with and Uganda, and they said, we're putting your story out there to these different places. And they know what kids they have available right now. And they try very hard to make a really great match between family and child.

And I thought birth to two, like, how are you going to. I feel like it's a little, like just throwing a dart at a board, like, ah, we'll give him this kid, but I really cannot emphasize how well they do this because not only do I feel like are the child, they referred us was a perfect match for our family, but also all the families I met adopting and their children, I was like, Oh my gosh.

Like, it makes perfect sense. Like that child goes so perfectly with. That family and probably, you know, wouldn't have been the best fit in our family. And so I don't know how they do that, but they refer to us a child, but their little personalities come out. So, so true. So quickly with any other family. I mean, no, we're going to get to Jordan and they're legit and that little Spitfire personality.

Let's talk about when you like, so the, these five orphanages get your information and they make the match. Now, how did you find out that they matched you? So there's a lot of conversation between the agency and your caseworker, who knows you so well at this point and the orphanage, like the person that runs it and makes those.

Decisions. They wrote me and said, Hey, we've been talking with this one orphanage that has the perfect match for you. And they said it could be anytime in the next few weeks that we're going to email you your referral. And basically what that is, is kind of like when you go and you find out the sex of your child, like.

They tell you who the child is, they send you a picture and then they give you all the like medical background or any information they have on the child and their story of like how they came to the orphanage. Okay. So you're like, this is happening. So I remember being at school and I was like, Oh my gosh, I think an email is coming in.

I was like, not sure if I wanted to check it. Cause I wasn't with Pete. Of course I did check it. And then it said meet Jordan mucosa. And I was like, Oh. Should I click on it. I do want to meet Jordan  and the second I clicked on it and saw that little bugger, I was just like, Oh my goodness. It's like, it all becomes so real right then.

Yeah. Yeah. And so they sent you a current photo. Oh, let me, this is also funny because let's go back to, we requested birth to two, so they really need. To refer you a child and keep in mind older, a child gets the less likely they are to be adopted. So really orphanages know the niche like this little time period is in the first two to three years that they can probably really get the child yeah.

Adopted to a family. And so if child were to be, and it's all real Lucy goosey, there's no like birth certificates or whatever, but if a child could be less than 24 months old, Then they match your home study paperwork and the immigration paperwork that you have, and you can bring them home. But if a child were to be referred to you and it said 26 months old, you can't bring that child home cause you weren't approved.

For someone over to at referral. Okay. So, uh, Jordan, they told us was right under that two year old Mark luckily. And so we're really unsure exactly how old he was, but we got pictures that were fairly current. And then we knew he was somewhere around like a year and 10 months old. Okay. Now let's address this.

Does he really not have a birth certificate? Oh, great question. Push button. Let's start with push. You mentioned earlier that there was no birth certificate. It is very antiquated that you don't know his actual birth. Day in age, correct. Like most kids there, there are no formal documents and they do a lot of lines.

We know they were born in the last rainy season and you're like, okay, great. That's a range. Um, so with him, I actually think his birthdate was pretty simple. I don't because he was abandoned then a few days after birth, so they could pretty much pinpoint it. But like with Priscilla, it was not a random.

Guests in the dark, but I mean, I think we're off by many months. Okay. So let's talk about Jordan's birth story. Like what do we know about what Jordan's life was like before you got this email with a picture of him? I think that's the hardest part. Um, I don't know a lot. He was abandoned on a Sunday and a little patch of grass by the stairs of this very tiny church in Buganda.

Not to be confused with. Uganda. It was Buganda in Uganda and, um, they heard a baby crying and they all come out, you know, after service. And there was nobody there fast forward, a little bit. I went to visit this place and stood in the exact patch of grass, holding Jordan that he had been abandoned in. And it was the most powerful moment for me.

I went around the whole town and took pictures. And when we were standing there, this group of women was cooking around a fire and ran over and they were the women that were there that originally. Found him that day and were asking, is this Jordan and wanting to see him and hold him. And so, you know, they do everything.

They can newspaper ads. They I'm saying it's old school. They go around like a megaphone in a van with a picture of him and ask everyone in the town and surrounding areas, but nobody came forward. Um, and so the pastor ended up, uh, taking him into his home. Which did not end up being a good thing. Talk a little bit about birth statistics in Uganda.

Like what are some of the possibilities of. Why there are so many orphans in Uganda and like, what if we can speculate or guess as to what happened to Jordan's mom and dad, or mom or dad, then what that means. Geez. And it's so hard because the one thing I remember them telling us, um, you do also just side note for you guys that want to adopt, you have to take a certain number of hours of classes online.

And I remember them saying like, so. I will speculate, but when you're talking to the child, they said, never give only stick the facts don't ever tell them something about their parents, that you're not a hundred percent positive of. And so I really don't know anything, but it could be possible that the mom and dad were not together.

And that the mom could not handle because of illness or money raising the child. It could have had something to do with a lot of people, hide their pregnancy. And then there's like a sense of shame around getting pregnant and having a child. So if they can hide it and then get rid of the child, no one would really know.

I was going to read some stuff here, please. I did some research research. Well, yeah, because we're going to get to some futuristic with some facts at this day and time in our social landscape. Well, let's just talk a little bit, and again, I'm opening up my book, birth story. That's coming out, but, um, Uganda's maternal mortality rate is one of the highest in the world.

One woman out of every 49 do not survive their pregnancy and or their delivery. I believe that yeah, 33% of girls will give birth by the time they're 18 years old, a hundred percent believe that 38% of the population is infected with malaria each year. With over a thousand deaths, uh, both of your children and malaria more than one time.

Yep. While I was there, Andrew and my husband. Yeah. Multiple times. But thankfully they were able to get treatment, but there are 11,000 deaths and Uganda. Yeah. You need to get treated immediately. Yes. So 6% of the population is HIV positive. Yup. Most of Ugandans make less than a thousand dollars overall, even with when you include the big cities a thousand a month.

Um, the average. Salary at the particular orphanage that you have adopted from Kidron Valley is 80 us dollars per month. If you're a teacher yet, and the caregivers are less. Yeah. So these are just some of the reasons there are two and a half. I was gonna say, it's the orphan capital of the world. It's 2.5 million million 0.5 million orphans.

And so we don't know what happened to Jordan's mom, but there you are standing outside this church on that patch of grass, like holding your son and the women in the village are coming around you. And at this point they know that they're happy. And I'm assuming they're celebrating with you that this little baby, that they were.

Concerned about now is on his way home. Yep. And, you know, Jordan, he's the life of everything, every party every day. And he just starts like giggling and dancing and it was just this really joyful moment and to see where he had gone. Cause I think I know, you know, he was eight and a half pounds at almost a year and a half old and he really looked like a malnourished newborn when he was a year and a half, but was not fed regularly.

And so. The equivalent of DSS in their village, then they came and saw the state Jordan was in and took him. And he was on the brink of death. Yes. At this point. And he was somehow taken to hospital or was he taken to the, the police who brought him immediately to Kidron. And they sent me before the actual arrival of.

Jordan and Priscilla and the U S they sent me this photo album of all these things. Sure. It's from the first day they took him in all the way throughout the years that I had never seen. Cause it was before I knew Jordan and yeah, it was all that. It was like the missing piece of the puzzle. Like I got to see.

Yeah. His life for the first two years so that he slowly started to be able to sit up. But when he was one and a half, two years old, he was just getting the strength to sit and have core strength and stand. He couldn't walk when I first met him and he was almost too, cause at first he was abandoned next.

He was completely neglected. Yup. And then he was brought to the orphanage and to the nurse back to health. Okay. So we kind of jumped all around. Didn't we though. Yeah, I know. Push. I would like to know, yes, your first meeting with him. I'm like waiting for that. So we arrive in Uganda. I mean, first let's talk about it is a day to two days of traveling, many, many flights, all eight hours to here, eight hours a day, you look disgusting.

You finally arrive, but you left your kids at home, right? You and your husband, what kids, we're all in our own great time. And we arrive in Kampala, which is where you have to fly in and you got into cause there's one international airport. And then we're still three hours away from ginger. So big John, um, who leads the whole mission is the one that picks you up.

And he is just the best thing ever. And you called him big John. I met him as pastor John. Yes. He first we, I don't call him big John, but that's like how all of his emails me he's like, hello, I am big John. I'll be the one picking you up. And, um, he's the best thing ever. We ran, hugged him and. In all honesty, knowing him now and remembering the first trip we get in the car and start driving in Uganda is all red clay and bumpy roads nothing's paved.

And so we're like, and there's no seatbelts. We were like jostling all around. He is driving like 90 miles per hour or barely missing people on the side of the road. Yeah. And then like he gets some phone call, which they all have cell phones and he's like, sounds angry. Angrily talking with man whose car he's driving.

Then the car breaks down and we're in the middle of this city in the middle of the night with people like swarming the car. And it was so funny. So finally we drive the three hours we get to. Where John lives, we sleep a little cause it's like the middle of the night. And when we wake up in the morning, he takes us to the orphanage, which is this bright yellow building.

And we come around the corner and they all are pointing and saying, Jordan's in there now. Now we're going to take a short break to just share a few things with you and we'll be right back with our guests. Hey everybody. Thanks for listening. I've got a really cool opportunity for you to hear your name on the birth story podcast, and that is by writing a review.

So I was hoping that you might push pause right now. Scroll down on your podcast app, hit a five star and then click the rate or review just a few sentences can mean everything. So let's listen to a couple C L T love. Love this podcast, it's everything. And more that I needed to prepare for my VBAC. And then Paquita seven to zero.

This is an amazing podcast. I wish it was around when I was pregnant with my first, but we definitely listened to it with our second. Heidi is informative, fun and inclusive to all clients. She serves in interviews. She presents on diverse topics and interviews, a variety of couples about their birth experiences, which I found so helpful to listen to.

So. Thanks CLT love and Paquita seven 20. And on next week's episode, you might hear your own name. If you take Jessica minute to write me a review, Hey guys, if you're enjoying this podcast, then I need your help to spread the word. If you know, anyone who is pregnant is trying to become pregnant or, or just loves a good birth story.

If you could send them to iTunes or Stitcher or Spotify or SoundCloud, wherever they listen to their podcasts and ask them to subscribe to the birth story podcast. We walk around the corner and Jordan comes like toddling crawling, falling into my lap with the most insane giggle, like contagious, awesome laughter and just rolled all over me.

And it was like the best moment ever. And I just thought he was so and little did we know if I look back at pictures of it, that Priscilla was sitting directly next to him, eating porridge, looking at us the whole time, the whole time. Okay. So can I, can I ask what the timeframe was so excited, push pushed her button.

What's the timeframe from when you got the email that you were placed with the child to when you had your first visit over. So that part's awesome. It was really like three weeks. Oh, wow. Like we went immediately after getting the referral. Okay. Cause it had been over a year. Yeah. At this point started, right?

Yeah. So from, from the time you said, Oh, I want to adopt to the time you landed in Uganda was over a year. And good question, Megan, because side note, right, as we were accepting, and that we're meeting him is when the law changed. And all of a sudden they were saying, we were supposed to go on one trip and meet him and the, and stay for a few weeks and then come back and do the court process and bring him home.

Well, Right. As soon as we had been referred and met him and knew he was ours, they said, now you have to the law change. You have to foster him for a year before you can even think about going to court. So you're about, you've met this bubbly, cute smiley Jordan, and he's yours and you're there with him and you're supposed to bring him home the next time.

Yeah. And then they're like, Oh, surprise, I'm sorry. You've paid all this thousands of dollars. I realize why everyone said international adoption. Well, adoption in general is like this crazy roller coaster ride. So you gotta be ready, meaning that you had a decision. It'd be like, could have ended the referral.

Sorry, Jordan reverse. You're not, we're not going to read no way that was happening, but yes. Or you could have. Stuck it out, which is what you guys did change my life. Yep. So you decided that you were going to adhere to this new law yep. And foster your child in country for an entire year. Yup. You could start the paperwork process.

Best thing that ever happened to us and the most painful news to ever receive, but yep. Yep. And you did it, you hung out with him. Yep. And he played, so we had him for this whole first weekend. It was not. Like, I don't want to paint a picture of it being blissful and perfect. It was, we played, it was so much fun.

And then, you know, reality sets in and they like, you literally go and have brought diapers clothes. Medicine in case he gets sick and then they just hand him to you with a few pairs of scraggly, you know, like ripped clothes from the orphanage and are like, here you go. And so all of a sudden, 24 seven, you have this child and you're staying in a new surrounding as you leave the orphanage, the orphanage, the orphanage with him, take him away from the orphanage stay.

Oh my gosh. I can't remember what they call. It was pastor John's like guest house. Area and yeah, I mean, everything's different there, right? Like we didn't have a mode of transportation and we don't know how to get places and we don't speak the language. We don't look like everybody else. So I mean, it's a lot of new being thrown at you.

And then you have this child who is so happy and it's so exciting, but then I'm like, Oh my God, is he potty train? Is he like. What can he do? What can't he do at night? He's got, yeah. These tantrums and rituals that I think he was used to doing to like sooth himself to sleep. And now you've got this woman offering hold you and rock you.

And I just remember, you know, I think it's a good to be transparent the first few nights, many times as I'm like rocking him and he's crying and I'm thinking, did I make a mistake? Like, what if he doesn't love me? What if he doesn't feel that connection? Like was all of this for nothing. And then you realize no silly.

Yeah, it's just hard. Yeah. Hmm. How long did you stay in country? The first time? I think three weeks. Wow. So you were with him for three weeks and then because of this new law, you had to take him back leaving and then ripping him. He would not let go and bawling. And the sound of his crying when we had to leave was.

The most painful thing I've ever done. And that repeated every time we visited, I'm going to say, cause you had to drive back to the orphanage. Correct. And then what message is that sending him? Right. Like he's totally attached, had been with us and feel safe. And were you asked, you were, you were saying mommy and daddy and you know,  with Jordan.

He was, I mean, not to sound. But this fall, but he was obsessed with me. He swatted and he called me mama immediately. And didn't want to be, I think you guys know he was almost two, but he really looked like a 10 month old. Like you would hold him. He was the size of a little baby and he would not do anything.

Like he would not, it was, it was, we had to force him to try to start learning, to walk and stuff because all he wanted to do is sit on my lap or on me and never wanted to be a part. So then taking them out. Did you have a baby carrier, right? You had just to carry him in and just be, I literally never put him down or had him off of me that first trip.

Yeah. Amazing. Now, one of the things I want you to share is they don't have traditional forms, Mila. So he was fed up. I wish I could even met. It was like glucose and margarine or something. Yeah. So then you had to, it's not nutritional, so they didn't, you know, there weren't wet nurses at the orphanage. And so, um, they were, when.

But he was first. They are the bottles that they're given. I mean, this is a big need, is what I'm trying to say. Like, it's a huge need to be able to fundraise money for these orphanages to be able to supply something as simple as, and it doesn't take a lot of money. Yeah. Because they're right now, the children are getting these like sugar water butter.

Yes bottles that just really fills them, but like, let's think what do we know? Everything that's important in a child's life comes in the first few years and so much of their brain and everything, you know, language, all these things are formed in the beginning. And when they're not getting adequate nutrition, think of what that does to their potential.

Right. Right. And we always talk about like one small change, right? Like one small change that we can make as a. Tribe of people coming together is to be able to supply nutrition. I mean, it's so fundamental, right. Even in children and that can change the world. So we're going to get a little bit more to the finances, um, in the end, but I want to jump ahead a little bit.

So this ritual. Just going back and forth then began because you had a whole year. So you had to then start going separate, right? Yes. Cause we needed to maintain jobs to pay for the adoption and we couldn't just, and we had to it children. Yeah. So you started going alone, then your husband, Pete started going alone and you guys started going every few months that you would have to name.

See Jordan still build those relationships. Um, on one of those trips, I was able to come with you. Yeah. And so I want to talk a little bit about our time together and how one became two. Oh yes. So. Right before I joined you in Uganda, just as a, you know, a friend and a support person that since your husband couldn't go different friends or trading back and forth on those trips, and you had found out that you could.

Adopt a second child and that you was never really on the table. So now we're in this long waiting period, but there's a light. Yes. Oh, you can add on so the logo, but it wasn't get one free. Yeah. Uh, so tell me about what that conversation looks like with you and Pete. Yeah, we met this amazing couple that we will forever be intwined with, um, who was adopting two of Jordan and Priscilla is good friends and happened to be there at the same time as me on that trip and had added on, they were originally adopting one.

And so when I started questioning them like, Oh, how did you end up with. The second, they said, Oh, we're originally adopted in this one. And then we found out that we could within a certain time period, add on a second. And so I started having that idea swirling in my mind and I brought it up to Pete and now I'm there without Pete.

And so I think right about the time you were arriving, I was realizing that maybe adopting Percilla because it would be on the same timeline, like. John, let me know that if we did it, you know, within a certain, like right from the beginning and didn't wait six months that we could probably have Jordan and Priscilla, um, go through the process together.

And so I sent him a picture of me holding Priscilla and said, what do you think. And he said, she's beautiful. Oh my gosh. But I really want to adopt Priscilla. They said that his breasts, Ella, she just has dreads this time instead of corn rows. And like, every time you went, her hair would be different. So like, you could never tell he, I was like, that is Chris Ella.

That's so funny because she had gotten. Bigger. Yes. You know, and her hair different. And she was changing from day one on your first trip, you had mentioned Priscilla was always next to Jordan. So when you look back at every pictures and from these nurses that took them in, then beginning Jordan, Priscilla leader, yelling back, we're always together, always next to each other, sleeping from each other at all to always holding hands and.

Jordan attached to you very quickly. Yes. But on that very first trip, Priscilla had attached with Pete to PS. And so when you kind of found out. It was on the table. Yeah, it was, Oh, if we could do this, we don't know how financially we're going to do that, but let's do this. Right, right. Again. Is where I say don't worry about the money.

Cause I do. Yeah. Tell us about Priscilla's given name. Oh, docus and what does that mean? I'm blessing from the sugar cane. Okay. Because she was abandoned in a sugar cane plantation when she was maybe eight or nine months, was the guests. But they weren't, we don't know when, again, no birth certificate or so you and Pete ended up having to, to pick a birthday for Priscilla and then pick a birthday for Jordan based on these like guest timelines.

Her given name was docus, but everyone at the orphanage called her Priscilla. Everyone called Jordan Jordan, correct. Is a given name was Jordan . Um, well, most kids had, um, English name and then an African name, but for some reason, Jordan didn't. So you had Priscilla and Jordan and you didn't have to change their names because they, those or they're given English.

Yeah. And they already had been going by him. And one thing I was always saying, when you were asking Megan about meeting Jordan for the first time, like one of my first memories is just. Every caregiver came out and was like, they called him Jordan knee and they would yell Jordan knee and they sang the song tumble LA Tamala, and he would try to walk to them and he just responded so happily to the chance of his name.

I was like, I'm not going to change. His name and Priscilla was pretty much the same way. And just so you guys know, they also assign a mama to each baby. And so his was Juliet and she was just like this amazing light in his life that I think really helped. And these mamas are very young women. Yes. From.

Or either they were previous orphans and had grown up at Kidron and were never adopted and then came to work at the orphanage. Right? Yeah. Or they were from a walkie walkable. Yes. Or, and then ended up jumping there. Yep. Okay. So the, and these are the women that make $80 or less. I want to say it's like 50 for them per month.

Yeah. Okay. So. I land in Uganda. So you are already in country or with another one of our friends and we just switched off our friend, Jess, and I kind of literally switched places at the airport. Like the plane I flew in on. I think she was flying out out on again. It was very late at night. And I remember thinking, I guess, I sh you know, some people would be scared or something, right?

I mean, my husband was like, if you get people might pay rent, sometimes, you know, it didn't even cross my mind. The second I landed in Uganda, I felt so safe. I felt so close to God. I felt such peace even on that Rocky, you know, broken down G cried, but it was amazing. Same story. We get a little bit of sleep.

So we went back first thing in the morning to get them. And I just wanted to tell a little bit of perspective. So I was. Oh God, 37 years old, 36, 37 something. This is just a few years ago, you know, so I was like 36 or 37 and I walked into the orphanage and everything, all Giles that came running up to me said, grandma, grandmother, I love that her and I was dying because at the time.

I had a one or two year old that I had left to go on this trip and I'm like, yeah, great. I am a brand new mother. But if we go back to the statistics that we talked about earlier and Uganda, by all means I was late thirties, I was for sure. Grandma could have been a great grandma and definitely was had only a few years left to live.

I mean, basically your life's basically over my life. My Ugandan life was basically over. The first thing that I noticed we didn't talk about is that the children were in. No underwear or diapers, they were trying to be potty trained, but most of the kids would just go and kind of like squat in the Bush to be potty trained.

And they weren't all in, yeah. Extra large tattered clothes and no gender separation of clothing at all. All the boys could have been an address. I mean, there was a lot of boys and dresses. It was clothes, our clothes. There were no like girl clothes and boy clothes. And I just wanted to say that, that it's just, that is a harsh reality that we need to face, right?

Like clothes, our clothes to protect our bodies. And when you are in a poor country and an orphanage, you're. You could care less about what their last rate and having something like a diaper underwear is a super privilege. And I remember coming back from Uganda thinking I have never worked a day in my life, this guy, what did you think?

Right? Because these women were washing those clothes over and over repeatedly in one day. While hanging them, changing the kids, feeding them, taking care of, I mean, it's the most amazing porridge pee poop, and they are hand scrubbing on these boards bent over in the hot sun. Yeah. With a baby on their back nursing one baby on the front of them and doing the laundry.

Correct. Happily seeing happy. And I remember thinking I am never going to complain about doing laundry again because I don't do laundry. My washing machine does launch exactly. There was just a few life changing kind of pivots. And we had certainly been in Africa a couple of times and seeing poverty, but it was a little bit to a different level.

It's just such a different level yet. The kids at this particular orphanage were very well taken care of. Yes, they were very well loved. They were very well fed there. Uh, school was taken care cause there was a school there in the facility. Yeah. So it's called Kidron. Valley orphanage. And there's a medical facility onsite too, and a lot of land so they can grow food.

Yeah. And pastor John, we actually went out to this, did potato farm and again, we're international soccer players and farmers now. Yes, no farmers. And we were wearing sandals. Yup. No mind to that. The other women were barefoot though, without shirts on and again, nursing their babies with another baby on their back while picking sweet potatoes and I'm thinking and pretty happy, so happy.

So full of shit. There's a beautiful view there. I remember that in the sunset was pink and it was awesome. Oh my, it was just. The fruit tasted like no fruit you've ever had before. Like in bananas, like freshly baked. I mean, one of the most beautiful countries I have ever been to, but I mean, it was like valleys and mountains and Hills and jungles and banana trees and the Nile river running through all of it with beautiful, like rock formations and waterfalls.

I mean, absolutely stunning country. So while we're there, you. Are wrestling with the decision of what to do. And we go to church on Sunday morning. Um, cause again, pastor John kind of does it all right. Yeah. And I remember pulling up and thinking where's the church, right? That's a normal thought. Where's the church.

I mean, I see all these people dressed up in their clothing, buying this beautiful colored clothing. Yet still mini barefoot. Yup. And I see kind of like this wooden hut structure with like corrugated tin nailed onto the sides of the room. And I'm very confused. And all the children from the orphanage have been driven.

Yes. And their finest clothing, you know, and, and joking. And we get in there and we, we have, of course you have Jordan with you and please just tell the rest of the story. You don't even remember. Does this little one waddle up on the side of me personally. Yeah. So Priscilla immediately comes running over and you had been wrestling with, do we.

Yeah. Do we add her to this adoption? And I was praying about it and it was funny. Cause like, just at that moment she arrives in like holds her arms up to me. Like, yes, I am part of this. I am in this family and I hold her and I had both of them and I have a picture of it. It's like my favorite picture ever.

And that I think very quickly though, I could not actually like hold and sustain the two of them. And maybe you took Jordan was asleep. So I think I ended up taking Priscilla. She ate every single snack I had out of my purse. That's my girl. And then she passed out on the chest out and then I have some really cute picture of the two of them at the end of the service, holding hands, walking away into the sunset together.

And then I was like, well, I think we need to, we get in the car to leave church and know we had, you know, Goosby. I mean, the kind of, it's just so different. I mean, this, this kind of church is. I love there's no church in America that I've been to that even resembles this kind of spiritual expression.

Right. I mean, it was just, and it's hours long and I mean, it's just beautiful and we leave it is hours long. And I feel like God gave you that the clarity and answer. Yeah. And especially when we walked out, Jordan and Priscilla are literally, like you said, holding hands, walking out into the sun and we get in the car and you were like, Oh, I have to call Pete.

And yeah. I'm I'm sure. And you called him immediately. And he was like, yes. And then it was like, and then it was, there was two. And so then yeah, we doubled. Yeah. Well, some of the things I want to make sure we get to before we finish up the podcast are how in the world. Did you afford to take two children?

Okay. Like now were your two and a half years into the process. Yep. And you're having these payments and now you've got a second one. So let's say for anyone who's interested in adopting, let's go through. All the creative fundraising that you did. So it's, and to remember that it all comes in phases. Like you don't have to pay that whole sum in one lump sum at once.

Right. And so if the whole process takes two years, you know, think about how much you could save on your own and like pay over time. But then think of all the things you could do as money is starting to become due. And so we've done, I mean, And I'm going to name off things. Maybe that I also know friends who have adopted have done.

Also, you can do, like, I got one friend that would sell barbecue, like do one of those dinners from like a restaurant. And then they got the proceeds from that one night was donated to their adoption. We sold t-shirts. We did a big dinner at like at a venue and we sold tickets and had people come and we auctioned off things from, um, Ginja and.

How do you Ganden dinner and spoke about the adoption in that raise? I think, I mean, I can't really remember. I want to say seven to $9,000. It's really important to know that you can get grants. And so just write them like crazy. Once you write for one grant, it's pretty much the same information you're going to give.

And so find ones that apply. To your story and your adoption, and then just keep submitting them because we got to that way. There's different places out there that give different amounts anywhere from like $500 up to like 8,000. And also it's important to know there's adoption loans that you can get if you get to the very end and you just can't make that last hurdle of like $5,000 or 10, you can get a loan that has no interest.

Um, for adoption, what else you can? Well, one of my favorite, what did I do that I forgot? Well, one of my favorite things is we went down to the market and ginger and we, Oh yeah. So I emptied out my whole entire suitcase and we filled our suitcases with every piece of it goods we could buy from the market.

And again, these artists are local and it's raw when you're in country. It's. Really inexpensive to have purchased all of these goods. I mean, I think we had several hundred pounds, but it's helping them in their economy. Cause like mama's flows still writes me today. And it's like, when are you guys coming back?

Because they don't get, you know, mass. Customers and you connected very early on with an incredible artists. Yeah. Angelo and Angelo's paintings went like crazy, at least in our area. And so people were requesting. Yeah. So I did alert paintings and then we were like, how many. You know, Angela, we went and met Angelo in a studio.

We're like, how many can we buy? Like, how many can you have these? Can you paint while we're here? And he did, he did them for you. And then you rolled up those dry canvasses and we, yeah. We you had a Ugandan market. Oh yeah. Several times. I forget, because I was still in Uganda one of the times. Yeah. Oh yeah.

You were in Uganda. We FaceTimed you, I think. But there was a big Ugandan market that then raised, they made thousands of dollars that up, or like allowed us to have the space. And it was like baskets, jewelry, the paintings alone would auction or sell for anywhere from three to $500. At least. Yeah, there was a woman here recently in our area that was also doing an adoption and it was around Easter time and she had offered to drop Easter eggs in everyone's yards and for like $150 donation or I'm making up the price, but whatever it was, and there was like 500 people that.

That signed up for that. So then she got all these volunteers to like schedule a route and then, so that, so instead of having to stuff, your. You know, well, a little listeners, you know, but you know, extra eggs on yeah. On Easter for Easter egg hunts, besides what the Easter bunny brings. So these extra eggs, and she was able to raise almost the entire cost of the adduction.

So. Such, so get creative because here's something I just remembered use the resources you have and the friends, the hookups that you do have, because I remember repeat saying like, we have some people who are friends that roast coffee. And so we brought back all these Uganda and I totally forgot this coffee beans.

And then they roasted them in this special, like, you know, Joe pre, um, brand and put them in bags for us. And then we sold that. And here's the most important thing that happens when I say don't worry about the money. It all just works out. I can not tell you how many people. Stepped up who I haven't even seen in 20 years and would just send me checks said, thinking of you hope this can help in literally the most amazing part of the whole thing.

I won't say the name is like one day we just got the, one of the final bills and we had no more money to give and it was thousands. And I was just sitting there thinking like, what are we going to do? And randomly I go into the mailbox and there is this letter and check from a family member of a good friend from high school.

Who said who I had not spoken to. I mean, probably since I was a teenager and said, my wife and I were thinking of you and I've been saving up thought you could use this. And that it was thousands of dollars and was the exact amount and covered exact payment we needed to make at that time. And I was like, does that people do that, people do that, people listening to this podcast do that.

You do that. Yeah. So get creative. Remember that God is good, that people are generous and I'm searching for things like that. Now, like people will do this for you. I'm going to go out. And be doing this for people who are adopting or similar things. Yeah. Because it's just what we need to do. Yeah. It's absolutely beautiful.

So we're going to kind of skip through the mush, but this continues on for you and Pete and Jordan and Priscilla sadly for another. Yeah. Year and a half, I ended up having to move over there, like full time because, um, this minister of gender dad, you know, imposed all sorts of laws that now you couldn't do constructive fostering.

If you're not living here full time and becoming a citizen, you can't adopt. And they had a time period where they were going to shut down certain orphanages and return kids to the exact spot they were taken from. And so they basically said, if you want to assure yourself that you are definitely getting to adopt Jordan Priscilla, you need to be here in country.

Having them live with you. So then, so you, your company, thankfully let you take your adoptive leave early, right. And then Pete stayed behind with your children. Yep. And then you were able to go get Jordan and Priscilla and then live with them. Yeah. And if this other family in a home that an adopted family had built for this purpose.

Yeah. And it wasn't easy. It was the hardest thing in my life. I broke me in a lot of ways. Right. You were alone. You didn't speak the language. And I wasn't with my kids. I didn't feel like I was married. Cause I mean, I'm not having that daily relationship with my husband. It was fine. I wasn't sure I was. I kept being told, you know, there's a possibility you're not going to be able to get through court and bring them home.

And people were getting rejected. Correct. There's plenty of people still living over there. Who've been trying to adopt for five, 10 years and I met them all that. Doesn't make it easy. So now your children were not under 24 months old. Correct. Now, like three, I went back and specifically read the law cause I was worried and they said, had to be at the time of referral.

Okay. Two and under, because I really did freak out. Yeah. So it was literally though roadblock, perseverance, roadblock, perseverance. Yeah. And at some point you were in Uganda and it still wasn't happening and the laws were changing and pushback and, and your leave was over. I can't lose my job. I need to see my family.

Leave them once again. And come back home, where do you send them? Because they've been in an orphanage and what message does that send, sending them back. And again, prayers get answered and this amazing family that had let us stay in their house. And an amazing family I was living with who was also adopting in the house at the time, said like they should stay here.

And we have these aunties that work here, who they've already become super close with. So, so you basically ended up hiring. Manny's what we would call a nanny. They call them aunties is to care for your children full time so that they wouldn't have to go back to the orphanage, correct. That they could continue living in that point of school and make it.

Yep. Yeah. And all that. So then time passes. Yep. And one day you get a call. That says Olivia four years later, four years later, four and a half. I think it was around three, three and a half with them though. Oh yeah. Yeah. Not from the day you started, but they said it was hurdle after hurdle, after hurdle.

Like every time, like at first, you know, they were going to clear everything and it's all through, you know, the embassy at the end takes a very long time. And then they said, are you sure that that pastor wasn't Jordan's father, you need to make sure that there are no possibilities of family members still being there who are looking for them.

So they didn't want to just take the Ugandan DNA tests. They needed an American DNA test. So we had to have something flown out of Emory at Atlanta. And I mean, it was like thing after thing. And finally the end, the I'm approved Priscilla. And that Jordan. So then we were writing letters to our congressmen and trying to get people to vouch for, you know, like to push the process along.

And I'll never forget when they said, um, Jordan's been approved, I got the email and I said, wow. And they came home on national adoption. They November 17th, like, what are the odds of that? Hold on. I have so much, you skipped too far ahead for me. I was like, I couldn't finish this. Story though, without the airport in New York.

So now at this point it's been many months and it's, you guys all have your jobs and only one of you can go over there. So Pete goes over with some, with Samantha, my niece, because the process, you can't just go for a day or two and pick them up and come home. You have to go through all of these embassy interviews.

And so it takes weeks and weeks, or you have to get you gone and passports for the doctor's visits. Yeah. The medical clearance itself was a hot mess, like crazy. Yeah. And they were cut recently coming off, Malia. Yeah. Malaria. And also, and if they have like a drippy nose or like, you can't take them to the U S and I'm like, what?

Yeah. So all of this is happening. They finally get through all of it. They get on that plane for the first time with the kids and they get from Uganda to New York. And just to short flight away from New York to Charlotte, all of your friends and family have gathered at the airport to welcome Pete and Sam and Jordan and Priscilla like, and we get there.

And all of a sudden we see at the top of the escalator. Like a random stranger, random strangers holding your children and bringing them down the escalator. Samantha. Yeah, because I'm dying right now. Yeah, because we are all assholes. I'm sorry. At the airport in New York would not give up their seat on the flight so that Pete could come home with his children.

Yeah. The one person. Not one person that was flying on national adoption day 2018 from New York to Charlotte would give up their seat. I mean, isn't that just the perfect ending. So my two Ugandan children who have never been on a plane, I mean are now alone. I don't know why I'm laughing. That's evil. Put it like, you know, what jerky people out there, if you're listening, give up your seat.

If some parent needs to fly with their children. So we were all waiting there and we had to FaceTime Pete in. Can I do, can I put a video on Instagram and I'll put a video on Instagram when this episode comes out so that everybody can kind of see, that was the happiest. It wasn't rolled around on the dirty airport floor.

I mean, it was the best. And it was that so rare and random that it was on national attention. Yeah. Which is what day? I don't even know November 17th, November 17th. Oh my gosh. That's. It's goosebumpy. And what was funny is randomly, um, this woman helped Sam bring them down because she couldn't carry both of them.

And then later that night I found out that it was like one of my good friends, neighbors, and they were sitting around that night talking. And this woman was like, I had the most amazing experience today. I brought these children down to an adoptive family. I'm like, and my friend was like, that's Rochelle.

I'd be like, and you didn't give up your seat plate. Maybe it was a different vibe. Good. Yeah. Maybe they were coming from Chicago. We're going to look that, that, yeah, it's a lot of weird signs and things lined up. So co-host over there. She's having a letdown. Do you need to pump? Okay. Well, before you, it's a birth story.

It's a birth story. Yeah. We're nursing mothers. Yeah. Okay. Because my cohost has to, Oh, but wait, was it November, November of last year, 2018. So they'd been home eight ish months now. Wow. And PS for everyone, you still have to keep doing post adoption. Okay. That was my position and reports. So it's not just like they're yours and you're correct.

No. And then I'm still in the middle of getting their re finalization paperwork and their name changed. I have their social security and their insurance and stuff like that. And they have citizenship now, do you see what's happening with push here? Is that okay? We're talking about all of this. And as soon as we got to the finale or like you're laying on the floor, rolling around with your babies in the airport, like she's having a let down because that's what happens when we talk about like beautiful things that bring us oxytocin, you know, and babies.

So now push over here, but hold on. Okay. Before we get to the pumping and peeing. Okay. We have just one more thing I want to leave with. So you and your husband's hearts were so big that you came home and you decided to establish a nonprofit true so that you could help fund this orphanage. And so the name is Joe Prix.

For Joe from Jordan and they call him Joe Joe there, and then pre from Priscilla, they call her Priscilla and we nicknamed her pre okay. Joe Prix. So if anyone's like listening and loving your story and wants to connect with you, like how do, how does anyone find you Joe pre.org? Okay. This is where we run Joe pre out of, but also we're on Facebook.

And I think it's Joe pre Uganda on Instagram. Okay. So Joe pre Uganda or Joe pre.org, and anyone can learn a lot more about Kidron Valley orphanage and ginger Uganda can kind of meet these teachers, you know, virtually and the mission of Joe Prix is to be able to increase the. Value so that the teachers are paid a living wage because so they can stay and keep educating these kids so that they have a chance.

Yep. Yeah. And let me tell you that you can get on TV and online and you hear these things and you never know where your money's going, but like, We've been there yet. Our board goes like every two months. Yeah. I mean, it's going right now. We've been there. You've been there for a years going through this process, like pastor John, these tests, right.

I've ever known to school. It's an incredible. Mission. Yup. It is to note  if you want to go and see for yourself, Mike's lined up. So let's do it again. I want to go again, but pastor John and his wife, Barbara, who run the orphanage are both orphans themselves and came full circle. I got you never really fully realize you're correct.

Yeah. They were orphans and cells. They came full circle to establish this orphanage is reminded of that starfish story, right? Like one matters. Every single life matters. Every life matters. And so if anyone is like listening to this podcast and feels led to generosity, then please check out Joe pre.org.

And we would love to have you on board my book. Oh, yeah, that's coming out. Birth story, your adoption stories included in it because I wanted to honor it in the book, but a portion of every single book sold is going directly to Joe pre. And I hope for the sake of this orphanage, I hope I sell a million copies.

2 million, 10 million copies. I don't even know. I hope I sell so many copies than I am able to shower this a world with generosity, including Joe pre. Yes. Rochelle. Thank you for being on push love. Yeah, Diane, over there she's done. This was really fun. It's really fun. I got really emotional. I take these off.

Are we done? No, we're saying goodbye. To our audience. So let's just do that. If you're thinking about adopting, we're going to give you a chair ready? Woo. You can do it. The money we can do it. The money will come. The money will come generosity. Be creative. I know. Okay. We're done. Thank you for listening to our international adoption story and Rochelle, let's go play with those babies.

Megan mom had a five. We gotta go let it pump. Okay. Bye.

Thank you for listening to birth story, Michael is you all walk away from each episode with a clear picture of how labor and delivery might go and that you will feel empowered by the end of your pregnancy to speak up plan and prepare for the birth you want. No matter what that looks like.

Heidi Snyderburn